Image: Caroline’s Cakes
I have a unique personal style.
Growing up, wearing the clothes I really wanted to wasn’t an option. I remember feeling strange, powerful emotions walking past the boys’ section or seeing ads for suits on TV. I felt chronically uncomfortable in my clothing. As a young teenager, I experimented and tried to find ways to feel okay. I remember looking in the mirror and thinking, “When am I going to look like myself?” I felt a deep melancholy.
I got a glimpse of myself the first time I shaved my head. I was about sixteen, and I’d had short hair for awhile. One night, I grabbed my dad’s buzzers and cropped my hair to a 1/4 inch or so. When I saw myself in the mirror after, I thought, “I am beautiful.”
Now, I can dress and groom myself as I please. I love the feeling of a new haircut, a fresh shave, an old pair of jeans. I have a distinctive style, and I think that’s in part because of my unusual development. Over a few months when I was 19 and 20, I got rid of every piece of clothing I had ever owned and started from scratch. Transition gave me the chance to make a lot of choices and do exactly what I want. Since I never took it for granted, my personal appearance is another little thing in life that I truly enjoy.
What are some good things about being trans*? Send your answers to email@example.com or submit anonymously.
In this series, I highlight individuals’ positive experiences. You probably won’t relate to every entry, but maybe some will resonate with you.